Monday 11 September 2017

Male Menopause.

When we hear Menopause, we think of women, but it's also a male thing too. I've been going through this  for several years. I believe male  menopause is more a physical thing, and mid life crisis is more a social condition. They are both entwined and experienced at the same time. The last thing on my mind was male menopause, it slowly crept up.  It's a condition no one anticipates or plans for. We don't deny it cause it's not acknowledged 
I'm 51 now. Looking back the first sign started 15 years ago, when my career in fashion industry was at a high. I was crazy busy , pushing myself to the maximum. My body had its limits. Until 36 I had no problems sleeping , you couldn't get me to wake up. Then the stress set in. I had problems getting to sleep and staying asleep. 
It was my body saying hey this is too much, but also that was my peak. 
At the same time my libido was struck. I had problems with getting and maintaining erections. Again due to stress my body sent a message. Looking back, if I wasn't so stressed those events would have been delayed by several years. 
As the years rolled on, I found I had less energy and strength. I used to go to the gym, do yoga, run the 4km in 30 minutes around centennial park. Those where my porn star years. 
But after 45, things changed . I simply didn't have the physical drive , my body was saying no, it said stop pushing me. My ego was saying one thing, my body had other plans. 
I was eating more due to less energy and exercising less. I became more plump, round. I was looking like a frumpy grumpy middle aged person. Welcome male menopause. 
I went from being a hot stud chased down the street to become a sacred cow that the public was shoeing away. Not nice. 
Male menopause is also connected to gravity. What goes up - our looks, stamina, energy , persistence, with time comes down or simply disappears.
It's also a welcome to mid life. I've realised fighting is not the way to go. 
When we hear the word menopause we think of frustrated middle aged women fighting the biological clock, rushing to have children at the last moment before their menstral cycle finishes. 
How about middle aged men wanting to have children ? I assumed being a man I can choose to have children naturally when ever I'm ready. I'm not physically comprimised the way females are, I will be ok.  I was wrong. This was hard to accept. 
Male menopause is all about physical limitations imposed by time and our denial to accept it. 
went to the IVF clinic , had my sperm tested, they said it was pretty good for my age. 
The amount of people who want to have children with a guy almost 50 is greatly diminished.
Your chances are as slim as a menopausal female. 
 Why have kids with a 48 year old, when there are guys 20s or 30s instead ? 
So my dick isn't as hard, I dont cum as much, I'm not as motivated , my tits and arse are starting to sag, my waist is ballooning . My friends are on Viagra or getting facelifts, but look like plastic dummies. Others do liposuction, only to put the fat back on. I just want to retreat at home watch tv while I eat another box of biscuits. Im lazy and feel crap. Male menopause is not my friend but a partner that's here to stay. 
What's the solution? 
Stop acting like a 30 year old, and don't give up. Go slow, but keep going. 
Eliminate as much stress as possible. It's poison to health, our bodies and minds can't take it. 
At 50 we our bodies can't cope with the drug taking, smoking, drinking , bad diets, partying . 
This is our chance to start acting responsibly, with acceptance and dignity. The secret is too look like you're living it up, but to do it in a low key way. Why run a marathon if you end up having a heart attack ? Why have 5 drinks tonight when really 2 is all your body can cope with nowadays . Why eat burgers and fries when you can't loose weight ? It's about low impact sustainable living. 
If you don't have the energy to go to the gym, go for long fast paced walks instead. 
On a fashion level. It's ok to dress 10 years younger, but please stop dressing like you've stolen your sons clothes. There's nothing more embarrassing  seeing these old out of shape guys dressing like teenagers . They look like like sausages. Wearing tight kids clothes .  . When ever I see these guys I think ....they're in denial.  
Fast hard impact living is replaced by slow thoughtful sustainable actions. 
Don't give up. It's worse. I have all these male friends in their early 50s who used to be physically stunning. They had 6pak stomachs , now they look like Santa Clause. They look sad. You know that look, they've given up. They stopped making the effort now they're miserable, and won't be around for ever.